After Pari was born, I called up our relatives to share the launch of a baby girl into our family.
“Aunty, we have a baby girl now”.
“Congrats. So how fair is she? Fairer than you? As fair as Sayf?”
They did not bother to as about my health or the baby’s. They did not want to know how the labor went. They did not care to ask whether Sayf saw the baby or how are things at the hospital or at least what we have named her or at the least who she looks like. But ‘being fair’ was important.
Oh yes!! I have seen a lot of this. I am a victim of tanned skin, and this was one of the primary reasons for my delayed marriage. My education, qualification, job or salary did not matter, nor my character or family background or personality mattered. All that mattered was fairness?!?!?!? Actually I have found darker people than me, but men saw only people who are fairer than me 🙂 :).
And when a ‘fairer’ Sayf fell for a ‘darker’ me, my mother showed her first sign of relief, “I’m happy that at least your children will be fairer”. What??!?!?
This is not just my case. ‘Dark skinned girls’ are considered ugly.
Back in high school, when a fair girl was befriended by a darker one, the guys referred them as Beast and the Beautiful. With great pain and effort, our friend’s circle made it ‘Bold and the Beautiful’. What people do not realize is that these harsh comments hurt their fathoms deepest emotions and sometimes become a reason to lose their self confidence.How unfair!!
How much ever I argue, degree of fairness is very important in India. For the same reason, skin lightening agents and fairness creams have gained huge popularity in Indian markets.
“When complexion gives you a headache and then plants seeds of jealousy and depression,it was Kajol who came to rescue me.She taught me that fair skin and threaded eyebrows are not necessary for being beautiful.It is the cleanliness of your mind and your energy level that makes you look beautiful”,Bhavia mentions about Kajol in 5 women I like.
Kajol and Nanditha Das are my favorite’s too. They are talented actors and very beautiful than a lot of other fair skinned heroines.They are towards the darker tone, but still have a huge adulation and fan following. It’s the same man-crowd who reject dark-skinned females, when it comes to wedding. So reel life can have black beauties while real life can’t?
And why doesn’t a man get rejected during a marriage proposal for being dark? Is it because the girl and her family are more sensible? Or is it the man’s job and woman’s fairness that together leads to a successful married life?
Fairness is closely related only to women, esp. Indian women. As usual, here is another inequality our dear society has shown to women on this line. They call men dark and handsome, but women can be beautiful only if they are fair.