Oh!!It doesn’t matter.. Post 10


Scene1

A: ” F got married. Did you know?”

Me: “Nope”.

A:”You were like best buddies in college. I thought you knew”.

Me:”Nope”.

A:”Well,he has invited me home.So I should be meeting the family soon”.

Me:”Good.Convey my regards to the newly wed”

Scene2

Me:”Hi F, Its been long. Heard about your marriage. Congratulations!!”.

F:”Thanks. Sorry, I dint inform earlier. So whats up with you?”

Me:”No probs. Thats ok. Doesnt matter. Am fine…….”.

Seems like am out of touch with lot of my old friends. A lot of us have. It is quite normal now a days. But even with all the easier means of communication available, they forget to update you on even the most important event of their lives. Am not demanding an invitation, but I do expect to be informed. And I still say it doesnt matter…

College was almost a decade ago. Yes we were very close then. But the years after that would have definitely brought a lot of changes to his life and mine. We couldn’t remain connected forever and so the bond slightly loosened from both ends. But not informing about the marriage does hurt. And I still say it doesnt matter…

We have all grown up and mature enough not to make an issue of ‘silly’ things. So even when it does matter, we pretend that it doesn’t. We pretend that these years has cultivated us into matured individuals to whom a marriage invitation doesnt matter. We pretend that we have been mellowed of age into those perfect adults who is able to adapt into the imperfect world.

We avoid people. It happens..

They avoid us. They should be busy..

We mailed someone and they didn’t reply.Can’t expect a reply all the time..

Someone mailed and you didn’t reply. They’ll understand.

So a small ignorance from an old friend and these many yrs.. So what??? I moved into the not-so-important list of someone. Doesn’t matter..I have so many others to move on with…He was important.But that was long back.

And I forgot to invite someone for my marriage. How can I remember all of them? It just happened so quick.. Doesn’t matter!!

How many excuses do we make everyday, again to pretend that it doesnt matter while it actually DOES? So what is it that does matter?

As long as we can pretend, though we are certain that our words contradict with the feeling inside, will we still say that it doesnt matter?

 

 

 

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Professionally innocent


My friend called this weekend, after she read the previous blog on CUSAT Arts Festival. We relived those old-but-gold memories of graduation. She hanged up after a while, but I was still stuck with the CUSAT times.

To a large percent of the population, professional colleges have become turning points in lives. Its you who choose to be good or bad, Its you who choose to be what you are,.. And some of you who would have joined the college, so naïve, so innocent,…. would be tuned,tamed and moulded into experts in technology and many other ‘subjects’ during these years.

It is during these years that girls (at least in Kerala) slowly overcome their timid, apprehensive, reticent attitude and show their inquisitiveness on one of the most important, rather interesting topics – sex. These 3 letters are deleterious, is what the parents normally teach children. Anyone who has a boy friend is taught to be treated as untouchables.When they hear about their daughter’s friend, whose sister has a boy friend, whose friend has seen an x-rated movie, the daughter would be asked to divorce that friend and keep no further contact. Good logic, eh?

Now, why I keep on mentioning ‘girls’ is because ‘boys’ somehow manage to jump out of this loop and find their on ways. Most parents have an explanation to this. “Afterall, they are boys…”Oh yes? Makes lot of sense!!

Under the impression of protecting their daughters, the parents are actually holding them so tight, that the children find no room to grow. No wonder that these ‘naïve’ girls, are either made use of or misuse their freedom, after they land in professional colleges..

However, during the millennium, when we joined CUSAT, there were a few in this category. So during one of the girls-only combined study sessions, topic got deviated a bit and the ones who knew, lined up to educate the ones who didn’t. I scored 50/100, and so was a moderator :-).  The class was done, but the talks went onto aligned topics, one of which was masturbation. Too much knowledge in one day, had made the class weary. But they were still ready for more KA, Knowledge-Acquisition. To remind the class about the seriousness of the subject, Neethu* – the most educated of all, quoted an example. She talked about a girl who had to be taken to the hospital as the test tube that she used for masturbation had broken inside her. There were frowns,grin and sympathy among the class for the poor female. But it all changed to a big embarrassment, when Lekha* asked, “So is that how test tube babies are born?”.

And this is why they are called naïve.

And this is why some parents should grow up.

And this is why Sex Education should be included in the curriculum.

* Identity not disclosed.

Arts Fest memories reloaded


This blog was in pipeline since the vampire blog. Blaming Pari always would be unfair, though she is one of the primary factors of my so called ‘busy-life’. The actual reason is that, uhhhhh.. I am a bad manager of time. Sadly, I am  🙂 But better late than never. Those wonderful memories of CUSAT and Arts Festivals, let me scribble some more of them right away.

Being the super seniors at college, we were in charge of Arts Fest 2003. Oh!! Back then, all of us were swamped, overloaded, having more than enough on our plates, so occupied,… that looking after Pari would be a lot easier 🙂 Each of us would be delegated an event (either off stage or on stage), and this would be in addition to the events that you participate in. People would need your help at green rooms. Back ground screens would be required for the dances and fashion shows. Guys provided the raw materials and girls proudly materialized their ideas 🙂 One time they even gave us a few buckets of paint and a huge screen which would be as large as a 9×11 dining hall, to create a desert background. We had a sleepless yet eventful night walking and rolling over the screen for the right sand dune impression. Well, sleepless nights were not a big deal when it came to winning the championship.

But Oppana, seemed to be the most effortless of all. Electronics (my stream) team had surpassed and wiped out all the competitors for the last 3 yrs. This being the 4th and final year, we had pressure to maintain the lead position. But as usual, it was a sure win.

So as mentioned in the previous blog, Parvathy (one of the Oppana team members) tried her best to overcome her heavy dopey eyes. We were yet to start our practice for oppana, which was supposed to be at evening 5.  Time would be 3:00am. Dead tired after a day’s eastern dance practice, I found myself comfortable on one of those class room benches.

Walloping hands woke me up. 5:00am. The oppana practice had started. I got up with a jerk, wondering how much they would have covered already. They were nothing, but a bunch of sleepyheads, lazily swaying and clapping hands, going round and round in their own ways, with a clumsy smile at regular intervals. I too was sleepy and was sure I would end up like them during the practice. But Parvathy who stood in the front row of the team, looked more energetic than ever. I still wonder how she carries so much energy in her tiny body!! Hastily, I joined them. During the breaks, Parvathy taught me all the steps that I missed. We were so spirited then that we even skipped breakfast. A packet of parle biscuit and some bananas, was all we had for lunch. The restlessness during two previous nights of insomina had eaten 90% of my grey cells that I could not even recollect 2 subsequent steps even when it was 5pm. The whole team was in the same boat, except for Parvathy. The schedule was postponed by another 2 more hrs. But it did not matter. We needed a plan and we came up with not one, but three.

PlanA. Try to remember the steps and dance.

PlanB. If Plan A doesn’t work, look at your pair and dance

Plan C. If your pair too doesn’t know, look at Parvathy and dance 🙂 🙂

It was 7:00pm when they called our team on the stage. All of us lined up on the stage. The curtains raised. The song started. With huge expectations, the Electronics crowd cheered us. We started our oppana, the dearest, most favorite and reliable piece of event which always earned points to score high on the chart. Step1,Step2,Step3 and then the song started looking different. Jasmine, my pair on stage, gave me a weird look. It was not just me, but she too could not remember the next step. The same “What next?” looks reflected on the other pairs’ too. But Parvathy looked confident. “Switch to Plan C”,Reshma from our front pair whispered. All of us looked at Parvathy, our own Parukkutty as she was known, and continued. A few more steps, and Paru too seemed lifeless. “The song going the wrong way man”, she yelled from the front row. The rest of the eyes protruded. In that whole day, all we concentrated was what step came after the previous one. We did not notice who sang the song or how she sang. Height of bloody over confidence!! This singer team mate of ours was getting it all wrong. But we were on a stage and some presence of mind had to be shown. So we made an immediate on-stage plan.

Plan D. “We leave it all to you, Paru. Guide us please….”

“Girls”, Paru took charge, “Line up in front. 3 of u on one side of the bride, and 3 on the other”. We did.

“Now clap hands. 3 claps to your left and 3 to your right”. We did.

“Clap again, swaying to the sides”. We did.

“Now form a circle around the bride”. We did

“Z, You stand up and walk to the bride. Whisper in her ear something. Let the broad smile. Shy smile man. Shy!! Shy!!” Paru was all geared up. Her energy gave vibrations inside. All of us moved around the bride in similar fashion 🙂

In Oppana, brides remain in the chair placed on the centre of the stage and often give light shy smiles and reactions to her friends clapping and dancing around her.

Sajni, the then bride and the beauty of CUSAT ’03, did not smile , but got embarrassed by our performance. Little did she know of the mishaps in that morning. Since the role of the bride was just to sit and smile, she had just joined us before we entered the stage. Moreover, she too was experienced in the same role for past 3 yrs.

The crowd too sensed something wrong. Electronics team clapped in slow motion, with a vivid question mark on their faces. The opponent crowd started howling and Paru ran out of steps. So we came up with the next plan.

Plan E. Clap hands, walk in rhythm towards the stage exit.

The plan worked out. We escaped, but there was the bride sitting all alone in the centre of the stage. Sajni didn’t know if she should run along with us or wait for one of us to come and pick her up. Brides do not step without an accompaniment, during oppana.  But we had broken the chord and crossed all limits, so before another plan was made, one of us (I cant remember who) ran to the stage and brought her along.

To make matters worse, it was an open air auditorium. We had to walk through the audience to the car waiting to pick us, and we literally covered our faces with a shawl.

We were obviously disqualified, but the rest of the class who were not present in the audience did not believe us. They thought that we were making up a sad episode for fun, when we told them what had happened. They had such a huge faith in us.

Years later, I still mention this as a joke to friends and family. But deep inside am hurt. Losing the title is no big deal. But the fact that we took the faith of a whole class so lightly, burns me even now. I still appologise……

Btw, the desert background screen won lot of applause!!

The night of Vampires at CUSAT


During my graduation at CUSAT (Cochin University of Science&Technology), there used to be a much awaited Arts festival every semester. Everyone would cheer up for their own teams, plan for the variety of programs for the event and spend time brain storming on how to win the championship and associated accolades. If at all there was someone in the class who does not participate for any competitions, they would definitely be behind the scene helping others. The spirit and unity of the class reflects so evidently, that all engineering branches will be rivals for those 3 days.

During the Arts fest which fell in the final semester, we decided to participate in Eastern dance (a traditional folk dance form that represents Kerala history). The competition was supposed to start that night at 7:30pm. Programs were delayed and by 11:30pm the dances began. After our dance that went kinda ok, Parvathy Devi – a skinny female who was the tiniest in the troop – was exhausted. She heard that coffee was served in a nearby classroom and went to have a sip. After a days heavy pratice rest of us were tired too, but the next item was Western Dance (this used to be the crowd’s favorite then) and we decided to stay and cheer up our juniors who were participating.

There were four of them stepping to the tunes of Michael Jackson’s ‘Dangerous’. The attire was amazing. Two of them, tallest of the lot, were vampires with silver body and black wings. The other two were of average height were vampires too, black body and red wings. They captured the crowd in no time that the whole crowd started dancing and howling. When the dance finished, we decided to join Parvathy.

It would be almost 2:00am then. Parvathy was all alone in the class room having coffee. With just a dim light in the room, she was half sleepy but trying hard not to close her eyes as there was another practice to begin soon. Suddenly there was a heavy thud from behind. “Can I have a cup of coffee?” Parvathy turned back, rubbing her drowsy eyes only to see a huge silver vampire spreading its big black wings waiting for coffee. She moved 2 steps behind, when the vampire asked again “Parvathy, did you not recognize me? Can I have some coffee?” Parvathy hardly heard anything. All that she wanted to was to run out of the room. But to her biggest shock, she saw 2 more vampires stepping inside, smiling at her, their wide white eyes focusing her. Parvathy wanted to scream now, but no voice came out. And to add to her shock, she saw her dance troop coming in frolicking with a 4th vampire.

Guess how big a laugh we would have had for the next few days…

We did not win anything for the dance that night. Sheeeshhhh!! I was the lead dancer too.. 🙂 But the fun we had those days were incredible.